Let's Play Chrono Cross - What? Why?

[GrandmaParty]

Grandma, Why Are You Playing Chrono Cross? This game is old enough to drink and like 30 people have LPed it

1) It's good.
2) It's bad.
3) We'll have fun doing it. Fuck it. What else are you doing? It's COVID. It's not like you're going outside.

What is Chrono Cross?

Chrono Cross is hypothetically the sequel to Chrono Trigger. It's got some throwbacks. It's got some beautiful colors.

It's got a completely incomprehensible plot.

And it's also got a "GET ON THE BUS" mentality for characters. Which I like, because friends are good.

How Are We Going to Do This?

This will be video. The Dark Id did an AMAZING screenshot LP over here if you're interested. https://lparchive.org/Chrono-Cross/

This one's mainly going to be me and Katherine and some guests I want to torture.

What happened to Golf Story?

Shhh. Shhhhhhhhhh. Shhhhhhh. We're not going to talk about that.

Spoilers?

Sure, fuck it, why not.

Let's do it!

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[GrandmaParty]

Reserved for more Poshul fan art.

You know I'll do something stupid like "Hey for every piece of Poshul fan art you make I'll donate to the Louisville Community Bail fund or the Resource Center of Dallas, your pick" eventually.

Yeah actually let's go with that.

Taciturn Tactician tried to do good and brought evil into this world.



YESSSSSSS





Mizuti got ahold of the original translator for a statement.





JetpackJeezus is become Poshul.



Carbon Dioxide busted out his art skills for us with some fan fiction too.

[The Flying Twybil]

Oh, heck, I'm up for a GrandmaParty LP! Better yet, it's an LP of a thoroughly ridiculous game.

This is, like, a perfect recipe for one wild LP. Can't wait to see how this turns out.

[TuxedoTed]

I was thinking about replaying this game soon, so thank you for sparing me the effort. I love this game, but it is a complicated love that might not survive another replay.

Glad its a video for the sake of all the tunes.

[weso12]

This isn't Fire emblem 0/10

But in all seriousness, Chrono Cross is a mess of a game, that I saw an informative LP a long time ago. I'm curious to see what a casual LP is like, question are you getting every possible in a single playthrough or nah?

[GrandmaParty]

I'll get as much as I can in a single playthrough.

Which means when it's time to choose, I'm only making that choice once.

And I'm not a fan of children in loincloths being party members IYKWIM.

[Greener223224]

I'll get as much as I can in a single playthrough.

Which means when it's time to choose, I'm only making that choice once.

And I'm not a fan of children in loincloths being party members IYKWIM.

From what I remember, even getting a portion of what’s available in this game is...ugh.

I’m curious why this wasn’t posted in the “Effort is Anathema” thread, though.

[Mopey Dick]

This is a cool game. I respect JRPGs a lot more when they don't even pretend at being coherent or comprehensible, see also: Xenogears.
Playing it is naturally a pain in the ass but that comes with being a JRPG.

e: The kickass music also helps.

e: Regarding that LoL fancy kitty that bounds around... Rengar?

[GrandmaParty]

This is a cool game. I respect JRPGs a lot more when they don't even pretend at being coherent or comprehensible, see also: Xenogears.
Playing it is naturally a pain in the ass but that comes with being a JRPG.

e: The kickass music also helps.

e: Regarding that LoL fancy kitty that bounds around... Rengar?

Katherine watched me play a ton of Team Fight Tactics for a while and was referring to the Little Legend I had, which was one of the cats.

From what I remember, even getting a portion of what’s available in this game is...ugh.

I’m curious why this wasn’t posted in the “Effort is Anathema” thread, though.

Because we're gonna be here a while. And there's a lot to talk about!

Like that barrel that's the bar's toilet.

[Carbon dioxide]

Are you planning to talk about cat poo every video?

[GrandmaParty]

Are you planning to talk about cat poo every video?

That depends if this is a request or not.

[GrandmaParty]

Episode 2 is up

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A couple takeaways:

1) I married well;

2) Even the game knows that Poshul is a pile of garbage and I still love her;

3) I'm actually really enjoying this. Especially the old man who just completely rocks our ass.

4) Sorry about the little bit of excess noise. The I couldn't edit out my squeaky chair. I'm working on it.

5) How the fuck did i not name Poshul Pnurtis?

[Carbon dioxide]

Real talk, I've been wanting to get a feel of this game for a while because everyone says it's bad especially compared to Chrono Trigger. I've tried watching LPs of it but I usually get bored of them quite quickly. I hope your commentary will be able to pull me through this time.

I really don't know anything about the plot or anything.

[TuxedoTed]

It's honestly a pretty great game, all things told. It's just bad as a sequel to Chrono Trigger. If you can let that go and enjoy it based on its own merits you'll probably have a real good time with it.

[GrandmaParty]

It's honestly a pretty great game, all things told. It's just bad as a sequel to Chrono Trigger. If you can let that go and enjoy it based on its own merits you'll probably have a real good time with it.

I'm just enjoying the ride for now. Funnily enough Katherine swore she loved this game and is having on it and I thought I'd bag on it the whole time.

[GrandmaParty]

I've updated with terrible Poshul fan art people have made from other forums for this LP.

[Carbon dioxide]

Wait, there's charity involved?

Well, I haven't made any art since like art class in middle school 300 years ago, but for charity I'll try anything.

I have no idea why I was suddenly reminded of this ancient meme but I feel it fits.

[GrandmaParty]

Is..is that a crown?

Ten more to the Louisville Community Bail Fund <3

[Carbon dioxide]

Is..is that a crown?

Ten more to the Louisville Community Bail Fund <3

I accidentally merged Poshul's hair with Crono's, I think.

[GrandmaParty]

She's videogame royalty and deserves to be treated as such

[GrandmaParty]

Episode 3 is up

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A couple takeaways:

1) A new world means new lizards to kill;

2) Some lizards you can't kill;

3) The game definitely dislikes Poshul as much as everyone else does;

4) I'm actually have a lot of fun still. It's not the deepest gameplay but it's better than a lot of RPGs.

5) There's a full minute of me just losing it laughing at a stupid joke.

Scabs was asleep in her basket all day. Sorry for the lack of meows.

[GrandmaParty]

Episode 4 is up

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After sitting really really still and still getting some static on the vocal track, I realized that's my breath. Daddy's buying a pop filter.

I also decide to show off all characters instead of just making Poshul really, really fucking strong.

Now that we have more characters, I think I'd like to expand the fan art challenge to include anyone in the party or shown so far. If you want to make fan art of this piss doll or Peppor getting hatched, go for it. It'll just make Katherine sad.

I think I'm going to work guest commentators in again. For funsies.

[GrandmaParty]

We need to have a serious conversation. Next episode will have a choice of three party members.

We can only pick one.

CHOICES:

A goth boy



His name is Nikki. He has a sweet guitar and a girlfriend, I guess? Nope that's his sister. He has hair metal style attacks.

A Frenchman!



His name is Pierre but there's a roughly 90% chance I'm going to rename him Dildor. After that weird shin chan episode, all frenchmen became Dildor.

Don't try to correct me that the Frenchman's nickname is Beezledrop in Shin Chan. I know what I'm doing. I'm doing that thing your parents do when they know the actual name but use the one they prefer.

I'm leaning Dildor for personal and story reasons.

A magician



His name is Guile. He was theorized to be Magus.

He is not Magus.

I need some really good arguments why to pick him because he looks boring. Everyone's a magician here. Meh.

[TuxedoTed]

A magician



His name is Guile. He was theorized to be Magus.

He is not Magus.

I need some really good arguments why to pick him because he looks boring. Everyone's a magician here. Meh.

That's where you're wrong, my friend. Sure, everyone can do magic. Some people are even magical. But only Guile (and maybe Sneff) is a MAGICIAN. Can you see anyone but Guile touring the Vegas Strip, sawing people in half and catching bullets while flanked by albino tigers?

Oh, but this isn't an argument for why to go with him, though.

Take Pierre with you. He's the greatest.

[Talisriel]

This game absolutely does not respect male casters. The examples I can think of are Guile, Sneff, and Mojo. We've met Mojo, we will meet Sneff, and here's Guile. My nature still compels me to vote Guile because he hovers everywhere, which is rad, his melee combat is telekinetically whacking people with his rod (and, like all rod users, magically blasting all enemy targets with their 3), which is also rad.

Counterpoints, he has NO plot/personality at all, and his Element grid can be a pain (it IS unique), and his techs don't involve pulling a rabbit out of a hat, but they might as well.

[GrandmaParty]

I fucking lied. But good news:

Episode 5 is up!

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You all know who won. How was there any doubt? I even gave him a special name.

Technically his name should be Beezledrop but I'm not going to be doing that. Dildor just rolls off the tongue.

Termina takes a while but the music in the background is actually pretty damned good.

Also no one fights or dies in this episode.

[TuxedoTed]

Commentary video's audio seems to cut from 22:30 till the end of the video, right as you leave Van's house.

[GrandmaParty]

Oh the shame. It should be fixed now. I think it just borked the upload.

[GrandmaParty]

Good news, everyone:

Episode 6 is up!

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God, it's such a good episode. How did I never pick Dildor as a kid?

Ketchop is probably my favorite character of any squaresoft game at this point.

They made a mistake not adding him to our party.

But Dildor is good enough to make up for it.

I love you, little shitty prince.

[Carbon dioxide]

Is it bad if I have no idea anymore what's going on in game and I'm just using this LP as a podcast for Dildor jokes now?

[GrandmaParty]

We're breaking into a house for...reasons? Dildor wants to be a dragoon? Kid wants to rob an old man?

[GrandmaParty]

I cannot fucking believe this is actually in here.

Thank you, Whitehelm!

[GrandmaParty]

Episode 7 is up!

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Some of the polish is starting to wear off of Chrono Cross. Especially with Viper Manor.

God those dragons are ridiculous. Random encounters start to get a bit bad here, too.

And you can start to see really how shitty Dildor is. But Serge is a monster at this point.

The clown lady we reference? Her Youtube name is Li'l Lunchboxx.

The banner art is a deviant art drawing of Pip as cloud strife.

[GrandmaParty]

Episode 8 is up!

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First commentator: Geoff, A ghost! Inside a man's body.

Part of the reason this took so long is because my Discord audio bot decided to ...speed up my audio track a lot.

I did a lot of ADR for it but left some of it in so you could see how fucking weird it was.

Don't know how to fix it but Katherine will be back next week. And she's also good.

After this episode WE HAVE A CHOICE.

THERE ARE SPOILERS BELOW.

Do we:

1) Save Kid?

or

2) Fuck it, go get Glenn.

[The Flying Twybil]

2) Fuck it, go get Glenn.

Let's be honest here, Glenn is for the win. Why wouldn't you take him? He actually sticks around consistently, even if he isn't exactly Frog.

It also means more ways to seriously mess with the timeline.

[TuxedoTed]

I disagree! Well no, Glenn is incredibly awesome, but it feels like we always go for Glenn in these playthroughs. Go the other route, get Razzly, witness war crimes. It'll be fun!

1) Save Kid?

[Nemryn]

Any time there's a chance to put a magic sparklefairy in the party, you gotta take it, right? Save Kid

[The Flying Twybil]

You know, this is all an incredibly valid argument against mine because Razzly really is great. Heck with it, I'm changing my vote: save Kid because we need the sparklefairy.

[GrandmaParty]

On one hand, a great swordsman.
On the other hand, a magic Sparklefairy.

Thank god Dildor is both.

[Talisriel]

Save the Kid, save the sparklefairy, for essentially identical reasons as my previous vote for Guile, with the added bonus of a personality and plot, but sadly minus combat by telekinetic whacking.

We have, however, established your propensity for Falsehood, and your disdain for boythongs. Just give Sneff and one of the rod-users you actually do get some screentime in between your desperate attempts to bring Dildor up to the power curve.